bash.org - המובחרים שלכם!

[J0HNiE]

אז ככה החלטתי לפתוח נושא שכל אחד ישים את הציטוטים הכי טובים שהוא נתקל בהם באתר bash.org.

:xyxthumbs: :xyxthumbs:

תפרסו 3 לכל הודעה, שלא יהיה ארוך ומציק לקרוא.

*** Topic in #doghouse is 'Our hearts are extended to the 17 victims of the recent Internet fraud'

* Anubis has joined #doghouse

<Anubis> what fraud?

<Kadmium> You haven't heard about it?

<Anubis> no?

<Kadmium> You can read the full story at http://www.tubgirl.com

<Anubis> omg wtf!

*** Kadmium changes topic to 'Our hearts are extended to the 18 victims of the recent Internet fraud'

:lol:

<LordChewy> so my dad found my porn folder

<LordChewy> and he was getting all pissed

<LordChewy> so its all like "does this surprise you? i'm not stupid you know"

<LordChewy> "i know dad"

<LordChewy> "what do you have to say for yourself?"

<LordChewy> at this point i stare at him straight in the eyes and say "C:Documents and SettingsRickyMy Documentsfaxessent faxes"

<LordChewy> and he just shut up

<kingKahn> what is it?

<LordChewy> its his porn folder

<xxxGirlygirlxxx> Thank you for listening to me.

<xxxGirlygirlxxx> You know your a really good listener.

<xxxGirlygirlxxx> Sweety please say something.

<Sandaedar> Ok I'm back.

:lol: :lol:

יאללה תפרסו בהמוניכם

[miaoo673]

sweet17: Hi

bloodninja: hello

bloodninja: who is this?

sweet17: just a someone?

bloodninja: A someone I know?

sweet17: nope

bloodninja: Then why the hell are you bothering me?

sweet17: well sorrrrrry

sweet17: I just wanted to chat with you

bloodninja: why?

sweet17: nevermind your an jerk

bloodninja: Hey wait a minute

sweet17: yes?

bloodninja: look Im sorry. Im just a little paranoid

sweet17: paranoid?

bloodninja: yes

sweet17: of what?

sweet17: me?

bloodninja: No. Im in hiding.

sweet17: LOL

bloodninja: Dont fucking laugh at me!

bloodninja: This shit is serious!

sweet17: What are you hiding from?

bloodninja: The cops.

sweet17: gimme a fucking break

bloodninja: Im serious.

sweet17: I dont get it

bloodninja: The cops are after me.

sweet17: For what?

bloodninja: Im wanted in three states

sweet17: For???

bloodninja: Its kindof embarrasing.

bloodninja: I had sex with a turkey.

bloodninja: Hello?

sweet17: You are fucking sick.

bloodninja: Send me your picture.

sweet17: why?

bloodninja: so I know you arent one of them.

sweet17: One of what?

bloodninja: The cops.

sweet17: Im not a cop i told you

bloodninja: Then send me your picture.

sweet17: hold on

bloodninja: Hurry up.

bloodninja: Are you there?

bloodninja: fuck you, cop!

sweet17: Hey sorry

sweet17: I had to do something for my mom.

bloodninja: I thought you were trying to find a picture to send to me.

bloodninja: When really you were notifying the authorities.

bloodninja: Werent you!?

sweet17: thats not it

bloodninja: Then what?

sweet17: I dont want to send you the picture cause Im not pretty

bloodninja: Most cops arent

sweet17: IM NOT A FUCKING COP YOU DICKSHIT!

bloodninja: Then send me the picture.

sweet17: fine. Whats your e-mail?

bloodninja: Just send it through here.

sweet17: alright *PIC*

sweet17: Did you get it?

bloodninja: Hold on. Im looking.

sweet17: That was me back in may

sweet17: Ive lost weight since then.

bloodninja: I hope so

sweet17: what?!?

sweet17: that hurt my feelings.

bloodninja: Did it?

sweet17: Yes. Im not that much smaller than that now.

bloodninja: Will it make you feel better if I send you my picture?

sweet17: yes

bloodninja: Alright let me find it.

sweet17: kks

bloodninja: Okay here it is. *PIC*

sweet17: this isnt you.

bloodninja: Ill be damned if it aint!

sweet17: You dont look like that.

bloodninja: How the hell do you know?

sweet17: cause your profile has another picture.

bloodninja: The profile pic is a fake.

bloodninja: I use it to hide from the cops.

sweet17: You look like the Farm Fresh guy lol

bloodninja: Well, you look like you ATE the Farm Fresh guy.

bloodninja: Not to mention all the groceries.

sweet17: Go fuck yourself

bloodninja: I was going to until I saw that picture

bloodninja: Now my unit wont get hard for a week.

sweet17: I shouldnt have sent you that picture.

sweet17: Youve done Nothing but slam me.

sweet17: you hurt me.

bloodninja: And calling me the Farm Fresh guy doesnt hurt me?

sweet17: I thought you were bullcrapping me!

bloodninja: Why would I do that?

sweet17: I cant believe that cops are after you

bloodninja: I cant believe Santa lets you sit on his lap..

sweet17: FUCK YOU!!!

bloodninja: Youd break both of his legs.

sweet17: Youre a fucking wanker!

sweet17: Ive been teased my whole life because of my weight

sweet17: and you make fun of me when you dont even know me

bloodninja: Ok. Im sorry.

sweet17: No you arent

bloodninja: Youre right. Im not.

bloodninja: HAARRRRR!

sweet17: Im done with you

bloodninja: Aww. Im sorry.

sweet17: Im putting you on ignore

bloodninja: Wait a sec

bloodninja: We got off on the wrong foot.

bloodninja: Wanna start over?

sweet17: No

bloodninja: Ill eat your kitty

sweet17: Youll what?

bloodninja: You heard me.

bloodninja: I said Id eat your kitty.

sweet17: I thought you said you couldnt get it hard after seeing my picture

bloodninja: Do I need a hard-on to eat your kitty?

sweet17: Id like to know that the man eating me out is excited yes

bloodninja: Well Im not like most men.

bloodninja: I get excited in different ways.

sweet17: Like what?

bloodninja: Do you really wanna know?

sweet17: I dont know

bloodninja: You have to tell me yes or no.

sweet17: Im afraid to

bloodninja: Why?

sweet17: cause

bloodninja: cause why?

sweet17: well lets see

sweet17: you say you have sex with turkeys. You call me fat. then you wanna eat me out

sweet17: doesnt that seem strange to you?

bloodninja: Nope

sweet17: well its strange to me

bloodninja: Fine. I wont do it if you dont want me to

sweet17: I didnt say that

bloodninja: So is that a yes?

sweet17: I guess so.

bloodninja: Ok. I need your help getting excited though.

bloodninja: Are you willing?

sweet17: What do you need me to do?

bloodninja: I need you talk like a pirate.

sweet17: ???

bloodninja: When I start to go limp you say HARRRR!!!

bloodninja: ok?

bloodninja: Hello?

sweet17: You cant be serious

bloodninja: Oh yes I am!

bloodninja: Its my fantasy.

sweet17: this is retarded

bloodninja: Do you want it or not?

sweet17: Yes I want it.

bloodninja: Then youll do it for me?

sweet17: sure

bloodninja: Ok. Here we go.

bloodninja: I gently remove your panties and being to massage your thighs.

bloodninja: You get really juicy thinking about my tounge brushing up against them

bloodninja: I softly begin to tounge your wet kitty.

bloodninja: I run my tounge up and down your smooth cunt.

sweet17: mmmm yeah

bloodninja: uh oh going limp.

sweet17: Har

bloodninja: You gotta do better than that!

bloodninja: Your picture was really bad.

sweet17: HARRRRRRRRRRRR

bloodninja: Ahhhh. Much better. I feel your kitty get more moist with every stroke.

bloodninja: I softly suck on your clit bringing it in and out of my mouth.

bloodninja: Your juices run down my chin as your scent makes its way to my nose.

bloodninja: I begin to feel empowered by your femininity.

sweet17: mmmmmm you are good

bloodninja: I feel your thighs tighten as I fuck harder

bloodninja: going limp

sweet17: HARRRRRRR

bloodninja: Mmmm I grab your swelling buttocks in my hands.

bloodninja: You begin to sway back and forth.

bloodninja: going limp

sweet17: this is stupid

bloodninja: still limp

bloodninja: Do it!

sweet17: HARRRRRRRRRRRRR

bloodninja: I turn you around to lick your asshole.

bloodninja: I pry apart that battleship you call your ass.

bloodninja: I see poo nuggets hanging from the hair around your ass.

sweet17: WTF?!?!?

bloodninja: They stink really bad.

sweet17: OMG STOP!!!

bloodninja: I start to get fed up with your ugly ass

bloodninja: I tear off your wooden peg leg.

bloodninja: I RAM it up your ass.

sweet17: YOURE A FUCKING PYSCHO!!

bloodninja: Then I pour hot carmel over your head.

bloodninja: And turn you into a fucking candy apple

bloodninja: I kick you in the face!

sweet17: FUCK YOU DICKHEAD!!

bloodninja: The celluloid from your cheeks hits the side of the cabin

bloodninja: Your parrot flys away.

bloodninja: going limp again.

bloodninja: Hello?

bloodninja: Say it!

bloodninja: HAARRRRRR!!!!!

[J0HNiE]

חחחחחחחחחחחחחחחחחחחחחחחחחחחחחחחחחחחחחחחח

זה חנק אותי בה' הרג אותי מצחוק! :lol: :lol: :lol:

[Zambar]

#98450 +(6797)- [X]

Jakefeb3: do you know a turtles only weakness?

AvatarOfSolusek: no

AvatarOfSolusek: well

AvatarOfSolusek: thier slowness

Jakefeb3: there weakness is they cant roll over when they are on their backs

AvatarOfSolusek: lol

Jakefeb3: now i have a plan

Jakefeb3: if i duck tape 2 turtles together they are unstoppable

[Cucilida123]

שמע, קורע..

ROFL כבר כמה דק'..

<JonJonB> Purely in the interests of science, I have replaced the word "wand" with "wang" in the first Harry Potter Book

<JonJonB> Let's see the results...

<JonJonB> "Why aren't you supposed to do magic?" asked Harry.

<JonJonB> "Oh, well -- I was at Hogwarts meself but I -- er -- got expelled, ter tell yeh the truth. In me third year. They snapped me wang in half an' everything

<JonJonB> A magic wang... this was what Harry had been really looking forward to.

<JonJonB> "Yes, yes. I thought I'd be seeing you soon. Harry Potter." It wasn't a question. "You have your mother's eyes. It seems only yesterday she was in here herself, buying her first wang. Ten and a quarter inches long, swishy, made of willow. Nice wang for charm work."

<JonJonB> "Your father, on the other hand, favored a mahogany wang. Eleven inches. "

<JonJonB> Harry took the wang. He felt a sudden warmth in his fingers. He raised the wang above his head, brought it swishing down through the dusty air and a stream of red and gold sparks shot from the end like a firework, throwing dancing spots of light on to the walls

<JonJonB> "Oh, move over," Hermione snarled. She grabbed Harry's wang, tapped the lock, and whispered, 'Alohomora!"

<JonJonB> The troll couldn't feel Harry hanging there, but even a troll will notice if you stick a long bit of wood up its nose, and Harry's wang had still been in his hand when he'd jumped - it had gone straight up one of the troll's nostrils.

<JonJonB> He bent down and pulled his wang out of the troll's nose. It was covered in what looked like lumpy gray glue.

<JonJonB> He ran onto the field as you fell, waved his wang, and you sort of slowed down before you hit the ground. Then he whirled his wang at the dementors. Shot silver stuff at them.

<JonJonB> Ok

<JonJonB> I have found, definitive proof

<JonJonB> that J.K Rowling is a dirty DIRTY woman, making a fool of us all

<JonJonB> "Yes," Harry said, gripping his wang very tightly, and moving into the middle of the deserted classroom. He tried to keep his mind on flying, but something else kept intruding.... Any second now, he might hear his mother again... but he shouldn't think that, or he would hear her again, and he didn't want to... or did he?

<melusine > O_______O

<JonJonB> Something silver-white, something enormous, erupted from the end of his wang

<JonJonJonB> Then, with a sigh, he raised his wang and prodded the silvery substance with its tip.

<JonJonJonB> 'Get - off - me!' Harry gasped. For a few seconds they struggled, Harry pulling at his uncles sausage-like fingers with his left hand, his right maintaining a firm grip on his raised wang.

<Khassaki> HI EVERYBODY!!!!!!!!!!

<Judge-Mental> try pressing the the Caps Lock key

<Khassaki> O THANKS!!! ITS SO MUCH EASIER TO WRITE NOW!!!!!!!

<Judge-Mental> fuck me

[artyom]

שלי זה שלי, לא מBASH

18:40 @wl|Viperius: I'm opped in (14/19) channels on (1) network. I have the power over (206/300) users.

18:40 @artlove: HOW TO CHECKK

18:40 @Craigo: /part

18:40 Suiy^^ has left #emo.et.pwn

11:24:12°pm (@artlove) _star can't make spaces cuz hes in Linux and alt codes dont work there MWAHAHAHAHAHA .

11:24:17°pm (@_star) unless with count the ***** ***

11:24:29°pm (@_star)

11:24:37°pm (@_star) no spaces?

11:24:56°pm (@_star) why dont you boot up your shitty ******** and try to make something in it?

11:25:12°pm (@Scriabinist) oh nice putting a period there you cunt

11:25:20°pm (@Scriabinist) I nearly thought I had a dead Pixel on my screen

[TheReaper]

זה לא חוכמה להביא ציטוטים מהTOP 100....

[Cucilida123]

נכנסתי לאתר פעם ראשונה..

פרסמתי את מה שהצחיק אותי.

לא הכל צריך להיות חוכמות לדעתי

[Aurora Borealis]

bloodninja: Ok baby, we got to hurry, I don't know how long I can keep it

ready for you.

j_gurli3: thats ok. ok i'm a japanese schoolgirl, what r u.

bloodninja: A Rhinocerus. Well, hung like one, thats for sure.

j_gurli3: haha, ok lets go.

j_gurli3: i put my hand through ur hair, and kiss u on the neck.

bloodninja: I stomp the ground, and snort, to alert you that you are in my

breeding territory.

j_gurli3: haha, ok, u know that turns me on.

j_gurli3: i start unbuttoning ur shirt.

bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don't wear shirts.

j_gurli3: No, ur not really a Rhinocerus silly, it's just part of the game.

bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don't play games. They f*cking charge your ass.

j_gurli3: stop, cmon be serious.

bloodninja: It doesn't get any more serious than a Rhinocerus about to

charge your ass.

bloodninja: I stomp my feet, the dust stirs around my tough skinned feet.

j_gurli3: thats it.

bloodninja: Nostrils flaring, I lower my head. My horn, like some phallic

symbol of my potent virility, is the last thing you see as skulls collide

and mine remains the victor. You are now a bloody red ragdoll suspended in

the air on my mighty horn.

bloodninja: Goddam am I hard now.

בכלל כל הדברים שהוא עושה אדירים! (bloodninja)

[J0HNiE]

חחחח לא הכרתי את bloodninja הזה

אבל תכלס ענק!!

[שניצל]

תהנו

http://www.encyclopediadramatica.com/Bloodninja/logs