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www.greencats.com

כדי להדגים לכם הנה מייל שהבחור שלך לבתי סוהר ברחבי ארה"ב. כמובן שהמייל הוא לגמרי הזוי ונעשה בהומור, מה

שלא מפריע לאנשים הרציניים במשרד לחשוב שזה אמיתי.

Original Email sent to various Prisons :

Dear Sir,

I am an 18 year old man who will be going to a correctional facility for a period of up to two weeks. This will be my first time.

I have a question for you. On TV shows and movies, when people talk about prison, they always mention that you shouldn't drop the soap in the shower if you go to prison. What does this mean? Is this some sort of prison ettiquet I'm not aware of? Is there only one bar of soap in prison, so the other prisoners get mad at you if you drop the soap?

I have asked some people in my hometown (I live in a small town in Canada.), but most do not know what "don't drop the soap in the shower" means. And the ones who say they do know just laugh and won't tell me.

Please help me if you can.

Dan

Response from The South Australia Department of Corrections:

I suggest that you contact the nearest prison to you and ask to speak with a social worker. As a first time, young offender, they should be able to advise you regarding any concerns you may have and what regimes you are likely to be placed into. The system in Canada is different to that in Australia and therefore the regimes are no doubt also different.

The phrase you refer to is a euphemism that is best explained by a social worker or admitting prison officer.

I hope this is of some assistance to you.

Glenys Madigan

Response from The North Carolina Department of Correction:

The term jokingly means to be careful, watch your back, and don't bend over in the shower if you drop the soap because you will be showering with other males!!

(So??)

Response from The National Institute of Corrections:

The NIC Information Center is a library of materials related to corrections.

We have nothing on what dropping a bar of soap in a prison shower means. I suggest you contact your local law enforcement and ask them if they know what it means.

Response from California Prison Focus

There are many dark jokes about prison life that express the fear and disdain people have about incarceration. The joke about the soap refers to the common sexual assault of male prisoners. You can get more information by contacting Stop Prison Rape...they have an excellent web site. ..........cpf

וזה עוד מייל לא הכי מצחיק שם.......בקיצר שווה קריאה....

הנה עוד אחד החביב עליי במיוחד

Original Email sent to various Adult Film Producers:

Hello,

I understand you are the makers of Adult Films. I would love to get a job with you coming up with names for Adult Films. You know, stuff like : "Shaving Ryan's Privates" and "101 Penetrations" and my favorite, "Good Will Humping."

These are just a few ideas I have for Adult film titles:

Anal Titanic

Bend Over Like Beckham

Crouching Penis, Hidden Penis

Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Penis

Hairy Pooper and the Penis of Fire

The Penis Reloaded

To be honest I have no prior experience working in this medium. But I am an expert at looking at a mainstream movie's Title and matching up dirty words that could replace the original words, while keeping the integrity of the original title intact.

When replacing the original words with dirty words, I make it a priority to come up with rhyming words, double-entendres or alliteration.

And if I can't come up with any rhyming words, double-entendres or alliteration, I simply replace one of the original words with "penis."

Also, if you choose to hire me what sort of Health Benefits would you provide?

Sincerely,

William Shaw

Response from Dave Stewart, JDS Productions, UK:

Hi,

Thanks for the e-mail. It gave us all a good laugh!!.

Thanks

Dave

(It's always nice to make a Porn Producer laugh.)

נראה לך שאני אקרא את כל זה? :book:

מחר....

:sleepy:

חחח Shaving Ryan's Privates .

הרג אותי המכתב השני ;D

אני היחיד שזה לא הצחיק אותו??? :

גדול! הבן-אדם באמת קרוע

עזוב!!

אני באמצע קריאה!

חח אני כימעט בוכה